thanks but no thanks

So there was actually turkey for dinner, after all, in our house yesterday. Found a 4-pound turkey breast that required only 2 ½ hours to cook, and it was excellent: just moist enough, skin perfectly browned with its coating of butter/rosemary/lemon peel. Carrots instead of sweet potatoes, as expected, but that was ok. Blueberry pie instead of pumpkin, and that was ok, too. The cornbread dressing contained bits of Italian sausage, apples, celery, and mushrooms. Again, excellent. Gravy really really good with just enough chunky stuff to be interesting. Three kinds of deviled eggs (dill, parsley, regular), a loaf of homemade bread, and omg Trisha Yearwood’s recipe for bacon-wrapped-asparagus bundles. Sour cream mashed potatoes, yum-m-m-m-m-my!! And creamed onions.

Now, keep in mind last week I asked hubby about what I should fix for Thanksgiving dinner, so I’d know what to put on the shopping list, making sure to include all his faves, but leaving out all the good stuff (read that to mean the things I like that he doesn’t). When I asked if he would like creamed onions this year he assured me he likes them just fine and yes add it to the menu.

And so I made creamed onions. They turned out great. Sauce perfect, tiny fresh pearl onions cooked but still with just a hint of crunch, taste of bay leaf just barely coming through, and with just the proper amount of heat from a dash of tabasco.

Noticed at the end of the meal everything was gone from his plate except the creamed onions.

I said, “What’s the matter, you didn’t eat the creamed onions, you told me you like creamed onions.”

He replied, “I like creamed onions, just not THESE creamed onions.”

“What’s wrong with them?” I queried.

Silence.

I tried again. “You’ve never actually eaten creamed onions before today, have you?”

A small voice came back from somewhere down in the middle of his easy chair, “No, but they looked so good when Julia made them on last week’s show that I thought it might be nice to try.”

Three guesses what will not be on the Christmas menu. And the first two don't count.